How I love Loretta Lynn … especially in “One’s On the Way,” when she sings about “Better Homes & Gardens” showing “the modern way to live.”  I don’t know exactly what was cutting-edge-modern in the year that song was first released, but I do know that the lyrics also referenced how the pill might change the world tomorrow, which it certainly ended up doing.

Yesterday, I worked bees all day with Honeydew.  I also worked on a settlement offer in a divorce.  All in the same truck.

There’s me, in my veil, in the 1 ton, with my laptop hooked up to the cigarette lighter and a wireless internet card boosted by a big antennae stuck to the roof of the cab with a magnet.  I felt pretty darn cuttin’ edge … also quite regretful that this modern setup actually worked in several (though by no means most) of the beeyards we visited.  Instead of resting in between checking for eggs and brood, I just switched gears.  At any rate.  Is this the modern way to live?

Here are the lyrics (written by Shel Silverstein) if you’ve forgotten them:

They say to have her hair done, Liz flies all the way to France
And Jackie’s seen in a Discoteque doin’ a brand new dance
And the White House social season should be glitterin’ and gay
But here in Topeka the rain is a fallin’
The faucet is a drippin’ and the kids are a bawlin’
One of ’em a toddlin’ and one is a crawlin’
And one’s on the way
I’m glad Raquel Welch just signed a million dollar pact
And Debbie’s out in Vegas workin’ up a brand new act
While the t.v.’s showin’ newly weds, a real fun game to play
But here in Topeka, the screen door’s a bangin’
The coffee’s boilin’ over and the wash needs a hangin’
One wants a cookie and one wants a changin’
And one’s on the way
Now what was I doin’? Jimmy get away from there
Darn, there goes the phone
Hello honey, what’s that you say?
You’re bringin’ a few old army buddies home?
You’re callin’ from a bar?
Get away from there! No, not you honey
I was talkin’ to the baby
Wait a minute, honey, the door bell
Honey, could you stop at the market and…hello?, hello?
Well, I’ll be…
The girls in New York City, they all march for women’s lib
And better homes and garden shows, the modern way to live
And the pill may change the world tomorrow, but meanwhile, today
Here in Topeka, the flies are a buzzin’
The dog is a barkin’ and the floor needs a scrubbin’
One needs a spankin’ and one needs a huggin’
Lord, one’s on the way
Oh gee, I hope it ain’t twins, again!

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